Saving Seductive

In a culture that lets it all hang out, I want to preserve a little mystery, femininity, purity. I want to be naked for one man only. I want to seduce just one man. I want to yield all of my womanly sexiness for him alone.

I’m hiding it, guarding it, keeping it for him. That is what sexy is all about.

On a drive into L.A. years ago, I saw a billboard advertising a brand of wine. It pictured a gorgeous guy and voluptuous girls hanging all over him; next to the bottle of wine it read, “The only thing that’s still pure in L.A.”

According to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary, pure is defined as unmixed with any other matter; free from dirt or taint; free from what weakens or pollutes; containing nothing that does not properly belong; free from harshness or roughness.

Ironic, isn’t it, that we covet purity in a car, a meal, a wardrobe, a sport, a paycheck, or a bottle of wine, but we taint our inmost parts—we actually chase after sexual impurity—as if our lives depended on it. It’s a race to see who can defile herself the fastest.

Our “bottle of wine” has been spit in, dumped out, mixed with dirt, roughed up, and we keep drinking. We joke about sex, dress to attract sexual attention, look at naked people for sport, and give out sexual favors without even thinking twice.

When my dad revisited the issue of pornography from the pulpit last Sunday, he said that it “hollows out a man’s soul.” When a woman offers her body visually or physically to men (it’s our warped way of trying to feel valuable, beautiful, loved), it hollows out her soul, too.

Sexual sin deforms the heart and mind until what is bad and harmful seems good and normal. If there’s anything that’s sucking the life out of our generation, hollowing out our souls, it’s sexual perversion. I sat next to a table of teenagers at Redlands’ Gourmet Pizza Shoppe on Thursday night and listened as one of the girls asked a guy, “Would you dig a hot girl, I mean a really hot girl—if she used to be a guy?”

How did we get here?

It’s the Church’s fault. No, it’s my fault. For compromising in the little things. For laughing at the inappropriate joke because I was afraid to speak up and look prude. For watching that movie. For dressing and acting seductively. For allowing lust a home in my heart and mind. For wanting to be lusted after. For that second and third glance.

Proverbs 5:15-23 may be the most poignant Scripture passage on this topic:
“Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman? For a man’s ways are before the eyes of the Lord, and He ponders all his paths. The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin. He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray.”

Purity is definitely out of my reach. Except for the grace of God, the righteousness of Jesus, and the empowering of the Holy Spirit, I would have no hope of purity. My best efforts at holiness would look like filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6).

Purity is such a precious gift. Matthew 5:8 says, “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.” And because it is so very precious and valuable, the battle for it is perhaps the toughest we will ever fight. Especially for us singles. With no sexual outlet, and hormones and passions that are raging, we face very unique challenges in the midst of a sexually saturated culture.

But God is stronger and better and rewards His obedient children. (As my Uncle Bob said, “God is not a debtor.” He never owes us!) Just as Moses “was looking to the reward” and so “considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt,” we too need to decide what is truly valuable and worth fighting for. Our world worships Sex. We worship Almighty God.

This week I’m praying for purity of heart, mind, and body. I’m praying I would “save seductive” for my future husband—and not let my springs overflow in the streets. I’m praying I would “shun evil” and “turn my eyes from worthless things.” Would you join me in these prayers? We’re all in this fight together, and we have a very powerful God who fights on our behalf and is forever for us! Let’s trust Him to do the impossible, to grant us grace and forgiveness in our sin and weakness, and to show Himself holy and good to a generation that desperately needs to see Him lived out in us.

“Therefore, put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.” James 1:21