A bike and a bowl of cherries

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Last night was our annual finale banquet for faculty and staff at ACA, so today felt like the official start of summer (although I'll happily be teaching summer school and freelance editing to fill my time). My roommates and I drove to Cherry Valley where a beautiful pool, cherry trees (I ate far too many cherries), and lounge chairs were the perfect prescription for tired teachers.

And if that didn't signal the beginning of summer break, my Target purchase certainly did. I've been on a bike hunt for awhile now (in an attempt to save on gas!), and I landed a gorgeous little red cruiser on sale. However, Belle didn't fit in my car--not even close, and I'm sure I entertained more than one person in the parking lot as I shoved and pushed and pulled that bike to no avail--so I left behind Ellie (the car) and biked all the way home.

I discovered new muscles in my legs. Or at least I don't think they were there before today...

So now I'm off to meet an old student at Starbucks. A tummy full of cherries, a sun-kissed face, and a smart little bike to boot. Ahhh... God gives days of refreshing.

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To the anonymous giver of $500...

Thank you with all my heart. What an unbelievably generous, beautiful, and timely gift!

Were you aware of my need? I assume so... but whatever your motivation, you will never understand how tangibly the Lord cared for me through you. It's a gift I will never forget.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Your Maker is your husband." Isaiah 54:5

My heart is bubbling over tonight. No. Not bubbling over. Full? Overflowing? I guess what I'm feeling is described in the words of Isaiah 60:

"Then you will look and be radiant, your heart will throb and swell with joy..."

As John Piper says, joy isn't complete until it is expressed. But then, it's so hard to put into words my happiness in my Heavenly Bridegroom; I wish I could adequately boast in the One who has loved me perfectly and completely, provided for all of my needs, filled my heart with His joy, planned out my days in His loving sovereignty, and graciously allowed small sufferings along the way to woo me to Him (to make sure I don't settle for lesser loves).

How I love Him.

And to the anonymous giver of $500: Thank you for letting Christ love me through you.

32

Sunday was my 32nd birthday, and I celebrated with Mickey Mouse. Lol. I'll always be a kid at heart.

But on a more reflective and meaningful note, I've compiled a list of top joys and journeys of this past year of life. Most of you won't weather the entire list, but it's been a wonderful exercise for me to compile and post it, reflecting on and boasting in God's great goodness and blessings--even in the midst of life's stresses and challenges. I am loving my thirties!! God is faithful...

In no particular order, here are 32 of "my favorite things" from this last year:

1. Returning to the stage after a seven-year absence! (see #2-4!) Yay theater!!
2. "Noah and the Ark"
3. "It's a Wonderful Life"
3. "Snow White"
4. "The Visit"
5. Returning to the classroom last August.
6. Discovering I actually love 8th graders! (I'd always sworn it was the one grade I'd never teach.)
7. Taking my annual trip to visit best friends in Washington, D.C.
8. Moving back to Redlands (I love this quaint little town! You can't go anywhere without seeing someone you know. Just like Mayberry.)
9. Continuing my voice lessons with Guy Babusek in Orange County. Guy is fabulous!
10. Renewing some old friendships and making some new ones (Dustin Ceithamer, Sarah Beth Mollner, Tai Wazdetsky, Erin Allen, Tim Mahoney, Sarah Ayotte.....). These dear ones have greatly encouraged me in the Lord, made me laugh my head off, taught me oodles, and inspired me to keep growing and living my life to the fullest!
11. Living with two amazing roommates, Sarah Day and Merea Price--two girls who have patiently loved me, encouraged me, forgiven me, and taught me so much by their lives of faith.
12. Breaking free from some major spiritual strongholds!
13. Talking to, learning from, enjoying, and adoring my mom in huge ways.
14. Hanging out with my not-so-li'l siblings: Katy (14), Christopher (12), Nathan (10).
15. Road trips, outings, and heart-to-heart talks with big siblings: Jonathan, David and Heather (due with Lil Langley in August!).
16. Laughing with and learning from my dear dad. He is still such a provider and protector for me.
17. Trips into L.A. and Hollywood.
18. Memorizing chunks of Scripture to music.
19. Celebrating my Papa's life at an amazing coronation service last June.
20. Receiving grace upon grace and forgiveness upon forgiveness from too many people to list here.
21. Karen Race's visits here... and my surprise visit there for her 30th birthday.
22. Attending too many theater shows and productions to count. Makes me so happy!
23. Hosting dinners and brunches and lunches in my home(s). Such a joy!
24. Angels baseball. Gators football. Enough said.
25. Running 2 miles on a fairly regular basis. (This is a big deal. Be impressed.)
26. Getting a pixie haircut. Scary, crazy, risky. Bows and flowers are lifesavers.
27. Shopping at Trader Joe's where several employees are now my friends.
28. Disneyland trips.
29. Cleansing for two weeks. (This included giving up coffee and living to tell about it.)
30. Loving my church family and seeing God do awesome things in our midst! (A shout-out to my amazing small group!!)
31. Missing best friends who are faithfully serving Jesus around the world.
32. Enjoying my Lord in new and precious and rich and deep ways. He has filled my heart with a greater contentment and hope than ever before. Knowing, loving, and serving Him is such an adventure!

A roommate, a marriage, and a mission field

Our dorm rooms were across the hall from each other during my first year of college, but for all practical purposes, we were roommates. Some called us inseparable.

Nina was sunshine and laughter (still is), and we packed in more memories in those days than seems humanly possible now. Staying up all night helped the cause.

Nina met the man of her dreams at our college (San Diego Christian), and my initial dislike for him quickly turned to admiration and respect. Brooks and Nina were perfect for each other (still are), and shortly after God blessed them with little Beau, He sent them to minister to a remote tribe in the heart of Papua New Guinea.

You can read of their amazing adventure on their blog (link to the left). And pray as this precious tribal people hears the gospel for the very first time.

I wish bestest friends wouldn't move away. But eternity will show how necessary it was that they did.

I'm still here.

August 2007 is a month to remember. In two weeks' time, I moved into a new apartment with new roommates, changed jobs, and performed in a 24-show run. My weekends were spent at the theater, and my weekdays were spent at work (I had one day in between jobs), so moving had to happen on the weeknights... little by little, box by box. I was also setting up my new classroom and throwing together lesson plans, as I was hired two weeks before school started. It was an exciting, exhausting time! The cherry-on-top was having two of my best friends, Karen and Carlynne (above) visit, along with Carlynne's wonderful hubby and adorable baby Caleb!

I love being back in the classroom teaching English to teens!! And I've discovered an effective new way to keep my students' attention: by dressing up as Elastigirl. (This is classroom management at its finest!)

(Yes, I really taught in this get-up all day long.)

The Angels made me weep this year, but not before the Fearsome Foursome got to take in a game or two... (I love my bros and sis-in-law!)

(Please note the short-sleeve shirts and my scarf. Undoubtedly I was wearing flip-flops, too. Southern California just messes a girl up, ya know?)

My dear lifelong best friend, Christy (and her husband Joey and beautiful baby Claire) just moved to Bangladesh two weeks ago. I am so blessed to have friends who lay down their lives so that others may come to know Jesus. (But I miss 'em, too!)

And that, my blogging friends, is a poor attempt to make up for my three months' absence. I hope to blog more faithfully now that life is back to "normal" insane, instead of impossibly insane.

May your hearts be richly encouraged in Jesus and may you laugh painfully hard at least once today! More later...


Colleen

Doubt, the dentist, and doorbells (cont.)

(Continued from yesterday)

I didn't budge from my bed: I was going to get a nap!! But a key jiggled in the doorknob, I heard a man yell "maintenance!", and in walked a very large stranger, who looked first in astonishment and then in utter embarrassment at the sight of me bundled up in bed. (The comedy is that I was angry and not scared.) Our brief conversation was awkward at best. He quickly left, and I never got to get my nap--probably because I was so angry that someone had ruined it in the first place. (Silly girl.)

Okay, back to doubt. Doubt loves to cast shadows on the very essence of who God is, keeping us from what our hearts were really made for in the first place: knowing and enjoying and glorifying God. Our doubt and unbelief cause apprehension (as if God were an insensitive dentist) and irritability (as if God were entering our homes uninvited, interrupting our plans). How He longs for us to know Him and believe Him for who He is, and trust that He knows what He’s doing.

Abraham of the Bible never ceases to inspire me in my faith. For all his faults, Abraham was characterized by his unwavering belief in God. In Romans 4, we find a stunning commentary on his life:

“In hope he believed against hope . . . He did not weaken in his faith when he considered his own body, which was as good as dead . . . No distrust made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what He had promised.” (English Standard Version)

Abraham knew God well and believed Him with all his might. He wasn’t apprehensive about what God might do to him, and he didn’t rage when God “invaded” the most important places of his life. He trusted God, “he did not weaken in his faith,” because he knew His God was the Almighty, Everlasting God.

God isn’t the dentist, and He sure isn’t a strange maintenance man barging into your home. He is trustworthy; He is perfect; He doesn’t make mistakes; He isn’t mean. He is the God who made the heavens and earth—and you and me. He deserves us being “fully convinced” about Him—and getting rid of that doubt, which will eventually (to return to my original analogy) take us captive in our own homes.

Tonight may we say with that old centurion, "I believe. Help me in my unbelief!"

Doubt, the dentist, and doorbells

Doubt builds its fence around the property line of our weaknesses: Where our finite minds cannot fathom the infinite, Doubt creeps in the back door. Where our pride persuades us that we know better than God, Doubt rearranges the living room furniture. Where we have known bitter disappointment and hurt, Doubt hangs his pictures on the wall. Where we have failed and sinned until shame shuts us up in silence and isolates us, Doubt throws a party.

I had a dreaded dentist appointment today. Many of you may sympathize with me when I tell you that I get slightly panicked and mildly manic for the three days leading up to a trip to the dentist. (Months ago I even looked online for tips to "surviving a dentist appointment," but when I read "avoid drinking caffeine before your appointment as this will only increase your stress level," I realized there were greater evils than going to the dentist.)

Anyway, today I let a strange man tilt me upside down in a chair, shine an old yellowed light into my face, shoot my gums with a needle full of unidentified numbing potion, chisel and drill violently into two cavitied teeth, shove gauze and water and air hoses in and out of my mouth, and then send me on my way with a curt, "We'll clean your teeth next time."

I was happy to get home, and I had a couple of hours to take a much-needed nap before my evening plans. Ahhh, sleep. Haven't done that in awhile, and my bed quickly lulled me into a comatose state. And then, a loud knock at the door and the chiming of the doorbells . . .

*To Be Continued (heehee)

I don't lose glass slippers

It's past midnight, and I'm trying desperately to think my way through an overly fatigued haze in an effort to officially introduce my blog.

A blog ought to have a proper beginning, right? A "grand opening" or some such thing?

But you see, when midnight strikes, I don't lose glass slippers. I lose brain waves. All synapses stop synapsing and all activity comes to a screeching halt. (Much like a Southern California freeway.)

So I suppose I'll keep this simple and thank you for stopping by. I do hope this small corner of cyberspace proves to be an encouraging, thought-provoking, tear-jerking, laughter-inducing, faith-inspiring, and oft-visited one.

You, my friends, are the obvious inspiration for my blogging. Until we meet again (and before my coach turns back to a pumpkin)...

Good night.

I like the way this guy thinks.

"What if it were discovered that fetal tissue were a delicacy? Could you eat it?"

-Stanley Hauerwas' argument against fetal tissue experimentation, as quoted in WORLD Magazine, March 17, 2007